I have never held a baby. Ever. In fact, I don't think I have ever come in physical contact with a child below the age of 3.
Today a lawyer on my floor had a visit from his wife and 3 month old son. They were downtown for an appointment and decided to drop by. Every single female in sight flocked to see the baby. They probably weren't even told there was a baby, their wombs could just sense it.
Anyway, the lawyer let one of the assistants (a mom of 2) hold the little baby boy and she was standing holding him for a good 10 minutes beside me. I thought to myself how ridiculous it is that I have never held a baby, and maybe I should ask to hold him so we could get this monkey off my back. But then I changed my mind. I didn't want to hold him. And it wasn't just because it would be a painful reminder of what I can't have (yet), but more because I kind of like being a baby holding virgin. It would be kind of cool (in a totally useless way) to hold my own baby for the first time when I finally hold a baby.
I was not a virgin before marriage, but I have only ever done it with hubbs. Maybe it's something to do with that? I don't know why this appeals to me, and I admit that it is kind of weird and perhaps poor preparation for parenting.
Don't feel bad about not wanting to hold other peoples' babies. It's funny but last week a former law clerk came by with her 4 month old, and pretty much the same thing happened. My law clerk was all over this baby holding her and playing with her, but I just watched. I didn't want to hold her, mostly because I am afraid of something happening with the child while in my care. The only children that I did hold in my arms since pretty much their births were my brother (I was 18 when he was born) and my niece and nephews. And to tell you the truth, I would not want people touching my baby!
ReplyDeleteI hope that your baby virgin days are going to be over soon with holding your own baby.
Thanks. How interesting that your brother was born when you were 18. Same thing with my mom - her sister was born when my mom was 18 and everyone thought it was my mom's baby (which would not have been all that strange given how early people have kids in Eastern Europe).
ReplyDeleteI don't really like to hold other people's babies either...you're not alone in it :)
ReplyDeleteIn other news, I finally fixed the stupid commenting problem!!!!
ReplyDeleteFirst, I wanted to say hello and so glad you found my blog (whycantthisbeeasy.wordpress.com)! I wish I had the self-restraint not to hold and coo over any and every baby that a)comes my direction and b) the mother lets me hold. I've been drawn to them like a moth to a flame since I was little (single digits little, lol). There is just something sweet and innocent and magical about them. Though I never much wanted other people holding mine when he was little either. Now that he is a solid 30 lbs, I don't mind so much, lol. I do LOVE the idea that the first baby you hold will be your own :-) I hope you get to lose your baby virginity soon!!!
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